They Called Him a Problem Child — He Was Five Years Old and Terrified

Sometimes the most powerful thing I can do is step aside and let a mother speak for herself. What follows is her story, in her words.

— Dr. B

When my son was in preschool, due to difficult circumstances, we experienced homelessness. We moved from staying with family members who didn't truly have space for us, to motels, and eventually into a shelter.

It was an incredibly destabilizing time. I had already endured profound loss in my life — including the loss of a child — and I carried a painful belief that I was somehow not good enough to be my son's mother. Because of that, I often found myself emotionally overwhelmed and dissociating just to survive.

In the midst of that instability, my son was placed into a school system that did not understand him and did not know how to support him. He struggled deeply.

He would run from the classroom whenever he saw an opportunity — as if he were trying to escape a prison. He hid under desks or in small corners of the room. When he became overwhelmed, he would rip posters off the walls and throw toys across the classroom.

He was five years old. Not a delinquent. Not a "problem child." Just a little boy reacting to a world that felt unsafe and out of control.

Judged

I would be called into the classroom, see the chaos, and immediately feel that it was my fault. I stayed to help clean up, often hearing that I should make my son clean alongside me. At five years old, in that emotional state, that didn't feel helpful or developmentally appropriate.

What was most painful during that time was not just the behavior itself — it was the absence of understanding. I was never reassured. I was never comforted. I was judged. No one gave me the benefit of the doubt as a mother doing her best under impossible circumstances.

The Pressure to Medicate

The school system was strongly pushing for medication. I was told that my son needed it in order to comply, to function, to fit into their structure.

The pressure to medicate felt less about understanding my child and more about forcing him into a mold. It created tension between my son and me, placing me in the role of enforcer rather than protector — and it disrupted the peace, love, and play that once filled our space.

When Everything Shifted

When Dr. Bustamante entered our lives, everything began to change.

For the first time in a long time, we were given space. Space to breathe. Space to process. Space to approach my son's growth with compassion instead of fear.

Dr. Bustamante respected our boundaries and our decision not to pursue medication. Instead of shaming us or dismissing our concerns, he showed us that growth was still possible — that we could build stability, safety, and progress without forcing compliance.

When my son needed to hide under Dr. Bustamante's desk during an appointment, he kindly gave him the time and space until he felt safe enough to come out. That single action — that patience — was the beginning of healing my nervous system.

A Voice That Was Finally Heard

One of the most impactful things he did was advocate for us. His letters created space for my voice to be taken seriously.

When I said no to medication and expressed that my son was better off at home with me while we figured things out, I was no longer dismissed. I had a professional standing behind me with clarity and truth.

That support gave me the confidence to step fully into my role as my son's mother and advocate.

Redefining Progress

When I began homeschooling, I was unsure of what progress was supposed to look like. I only knew the rigid version I had been taught to measure against.

Dr. Bustamante helped me redefine progress in a way that honored my son's nervous system and his individuality.

As I learned to patiently give him space — something that was not always easy — I began to see change.

What once looked like avoidance slowly transformed into play. Play became imagination. Imagination became curiosity.

What He Became

My son flourished into his natural talents. He discovered a love for gardening and cooking — working with his hands, nurturing life, creating something tangible and meaningful.

The same child who was once described as destructive became constructive in the most literal and beautiful ways.

He is now happy, calm, and confident. He trusts my guidance and follows my words — not out of fear, but out of safety and connection.

We found a system outside of the system. A way of living and learning that works with our natural rhythm instead of against it.

What I Know Now

Healing does not come from force. It comes from understanding.

When a child feels safe, seen, and supported, their true nature will rise.

What once felt like chaos became alignment. What once felt like failure became faith.

Dr. Bustamante did more than support my son. He restored a mother's confidence, protected a child's spirit, and helped us build a life rooted in peace, dignity, and growth.

For that, I will always be deeply grateful.

If you're a parent being pressured to medicate, to force, to fix — and something inside you says there's another way — trust that voice. You might be the one who saves your child.

— Dr. B

The 4 LAWS of Trust and Talent protect four fundamental human needs: Safety, Possession, Belonging, and Creation. When a child doesn't feel safe — at school, at home, anywhere — nothing else works until that's fixed first.

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